Geeky Astrology: April 2021
It’s time to roll the dice and check out the latest edition of The FHQ EDMONTON EXPO Astrology Readings!
The journey ahead is dark and dangerous. Luckily for you, we specialize in the School of Divination, so we know a little bit about what lies ahead. Spoiler: it’s not all going to be Nat 20s and successful Saving Throws. But, with the right company and our expert advice, you and your party of adventures can tackle any dungeon, dragon, or raucous tavern. Roll for initiative and let’s get started.
*readings are final, no re-rolls or trick dice.
Disclaimer: For Entertainment purposes only.
ITS HAMMER TIME – break it down, then break it in half ... Oh Aries, you have a rather strong proclivity for smashing things, and the occasional mountain troll. Your rage is satiated only by the heat of battle and pointless arguments. In April, channel that energy into collaborative efforts, because nothing would satisfy you more than the sweet stench of victory - even if you had some help.
Territorial is putting it lightly when describing you noble Taurus. You have a tendency to be, well, *protective* of the people, places and things (nouns) that matter to you most. While on the surface this may be a great quality to have, gone unchecked you have a habit of finding ways to seize control of everything. This is not the way. For April, utilize your unique capabilities and forge a dominion with equal power dynamics, and less reckless antics.
In typical Gemini fashion - you are ambitious yet impulsive, brave yet selfish, and curious yet aloof. You’re often tempted by the more devilish things in life, and yet sometimes even those do not draw your ire. The key for April is to focus on drawing inspiration and motivation for new ambitions that require no compromise, no deal and no subjugation. You’re a Gemini for Pete's sake! You’re your own girlboss - so own it.
Everyone draws their power from somewhere, and you, dear Cancer, draw it from something deep inside of you. How did it get there? Could have been a blessing when you were born, could have been all that meditating you’ve been doing, could have been that one time you found yourself alone at the mouth of a spooky cave, a voice whispering to you about your deepest secrets. Who knows, and honestly, who cares? The point is, you’ve got something inside of you that you can draw energy from when you need it. This month, re-connect with that power and use it wisely.
Oh Leo, as the self-proclaimed ‘narrator of your own life’ it’s no surprise you would seize the role of the noble Paladin. Your constant need to validate your own heroic actions often positions you as the leader of the pack (whether people like it or not). However, be warned, not everyone will take kindly to your efforts. For April, we suggest practicing moderation in your outspokenness, and take time to listen – especially to your good friend Cleric... We’re sure you’ll get along just fine.
Virgo, it’s no secret that you strive for perfection in your everyday life, so much so that you’re frequently labelled the perfectionist of the zodiac. You’re also very disciplined and always in pursuit of improvement, which is why we believe you have much in common with a Monk. As a Monk, your ideal day includes lots of meditation and some awesome Kung Fu. Sounds great huh? This month, use your patience and discipline to reach the goals you’ve been striving for.
With the right training, you can be prepared for any situation, right Libra? As a Fighter, your goal is balance and versatility. A villain knocks your sword off a cliff? That’s fine, you’ve got a plan for that. A 9th level Fireball is headed straight for one of your friends? You’re already lunging forward to protect them. Getting tired? No you’re not. Fight on, Libra, fight on.
If there’s something hiding in the shadows, it’s you, Scorpio. Your intense focus and comfort in the darkness makes you a skilled Rogue. With a quick wink and a flash of a smile, you make people feel at ease … right up until they realize you stole their wallet. If they didn’t want it stolen, they shouldn’t have made it so easy to steal, eh Scorpio?
Yer a wizard, Sagittarius. You want to learn all you can about magic and the world. If it’s possible to learn literally everything, all the knowledge in the entire world, you will do just that. Traveling to a faraway mountaintop to learn hidden rites from a master of a lost art? That’s just Tuesday.
Capricorn, since you’re generally known to be pragmatic and disciplined, we believe you have much in common with a Cleric. Like a Cleric, you are values-based and rarely stray from your beliefs and values. You are also very determined; you work hard to achieve your goals and never give up. This month, we challenge you to be a little bit of a rule breaker. Life can be fun when you live on the wild side, Capricorn!
As the most eccentric sign of the Zodiac, it’s no surprise that you’d be a Bard. However, the Bard is much more than a quirky artist, you have awesome capabilities like using your artistic talents to induce magical effects. So, Aquarius, we are asking you to channel your inner quirkiness to be the best Bard you can be. This month, we want you to own your uniqueness and live your most authentic life!
Pisces, your dreamy and creative nature make you a magical Druid. As a Druid, your ideal day includes a long forest hike, bird watching and thanking the ocean for being the ocean. This month, focus on enjoying the outdoors and appreciating everything the Earth has to offer!